We appearto be heading down the road of nobody is allowed to say anything that mightupset me – either intentionally or unintentionally. This includes politicalcorrectness.
TheAustralian Prime Minister’s partner, Tim Mathieson, was accused of making a”bad taste” joke about Asian women and prostate cancer during a speech at TheLodge recently. He was speaking to cricketers and said when getting a prostateexamination, make sure you get someone like a small female Asian doctor (withsmall hands).
While hemeant to be funny, many have taken an offence to this and it has received muchmedia coverage.
As anotherexample, two Australian DJ’s – Michael Christian and Mel Greig – caused a stirwhen they phoned the hospital Kate Middleton was in posing as the Queen and PrinceCharles. The hospital gave them vital information and the nurse who took thecall later committed suicide. Her family now want the duo charged for herdeath.
It hasemerged this nurse, before the prank, had reportedly been prescribedanti-depressants after two alleged suicide attempts.
It’sgetting to a point where we are not going to be able to say anything or doanything in case someone takes an offence.
Can peoplesay what they like about you or do you take offence?
Are youalready reacting to what I have written?
We need totoughen up.
The peoplewho react to what others say only see the negative side. They fail to believe inthemselves.
The coldhard fact is throughout life you are going to have people say things about youthat you do not like or are offensive.
This doesnot mean that it is right. It is right for the person who is saying it.
If youreact to what someone says, who determines how you feel?
Yourhappiness is based on them saying the right thing by you.
How DoYou Overcome This?
Make alist of your good traits – and give yourself 5 minutes to do it.
How manydo you have?
If you arelike most people, you will have had trouble doing this exercise and will havecome up with less than five traits.
Ideally,you should be able to list at least 20 things about yourself. If you are havingtrouble, [http://dl.dropbox.com/u/64266620/Traits_GreatPerson.pdf here is a pdfdownload] to help you.
If youdon’t like who you are, you will be dependent on others to like you for you tofeel good. They then have to do the right thing by you. They may need tobelieve in what you believe in, have the same outlook and want the sameoutcomes.
When youlove the person you are, you no longer depend on others to like you.
Whenanother person says something about you that is derogatory, they are notdefining you – they are defining themselves. They will be judged for what theysay.
It isimportant for you to define who you are – it then does not matter what othersthink or say.
You feelsecure within yourself.
The secureperson would have seen Tim Mathieson’s joke as harmless and meant to be funny.He did not set out to purposely hurt someone.
The secureperson sees what the DJ’s set out to do was harmless fun. They never thoughtthey would get put through and never thought it would end that way.
When aperson takes their life, it is that person’s sole choice to do so. Blamingothers is simply looking for a scapegoat to pay for what has happened.
Havingsaid all that, the secure person does not “intentionally” set out to hurtsomeone. Maybe all DJ’s need to have a look at what they do as publiclyembarrassing people may not be the best thing – especially if they are aware ofthe consequences.
One of thebest traits you can have is the ability to allow people to be who they chooseto be – and accept them for who they choose to be.
After all,don’t you want to be accepted for who you are?